Here's your chance

I am extremely vulnerable right now. So if you want to get your last shots in, please do so now, because that window of opportunity is moving fast. Whoever's in is coming for the ride. After this, Steven Seagal is taking over and then he's just going to snap your neck.


Ok he's not Steven Seagal, but he's korean, so he'll still snap your neck. Or detonate nuclear weapons. OOOwwwww, what? Too soon? Ok.

Sedimentary Layer

I would like to leave an imprint of my memory onto the internet. Just in case in the future, they can discover it when they dig it up.

The sun is pretty bright and warm this morning. I'm getting awfully lazy with my pushups, but at least the barbells are fun. I had a dream last night that I withdrew from my one position in a student group. I should get to that already. I'm starting to appreciate non-honey nut cheerios. Maybe it's just because I like milk so much, it doesn't matter. I'm older than one of my co-workers. She's graduating this year. I really like my carpet.

An encyclopedia entry would look like this:

Jarrett Bato
He liked non-honey nut cheerios

I'd be happy.

I bring tales of my journey...

I feel the quickest way to have one of those "We need to catch up," conversations is to use all you have available in your powers of expression to tell a story. Whenever I talk I try to include as much pelvis thrusting, eye-widening, ecstatic screaming, and excessive hand-gestures to express what I need to express to another person at some point in time. In the internet it's much harder. All's I got is clever combinations of words, imaginative analogies, and maybe I'll throw in some alliterations once in a while. Or do I? PSYCH.

Well, let's get started shall we? I last updated before my only class ended in the summer, so I'll start there. Cheerio. God save the queen.


Phew. That was a mouthful.

Yellow Bus

In case I forget. Cuz I go dumb more than twice a day now.

A certain Jomarrion inspired me to add some nuts to my blog today. (Which nuts? DEEZ) I'm hella stupid. I was so hungry coming back home today, so I whipped open the crisper drawer in the refrigerator to take out some chicken BREAST and it kinda stank. But I was really hungry so I dashed on some olive oil, chopped some garlic n' scallions and tossed that shit in thurr. I stared at the chicken more, and I was like I should consult Mr. Google for this one. So I wrote "expire chicken breast." After I wrote that on the search bar, I decided that this combination of words is pretty hilarious. Expire chicken breast. JEEZ. So I just went for it like the waterboy and cooked it. I even added a dash of pico de gallo. BBQ sawce, tapatio, salad, toast, hummus. It's ova.

Drive-by

What am I doing.

“Jarrett, meet the new guy, Jerry. He’ll be working your shift temporarily.”

“Hey, what’s up, I’m Jerry. I look forward to working with you.”

“Are you serious? Did I do something wrong?”

“No, (laughter) don’t worry Jarrett, it’s not like that. We just felt like trying some new strategies, so we’re shifting things around a little. We do intend this to be temporary. Think of it like a trial period. If things go well, the changes in infrastructure should be changed accordingly.”

“So what am I supposed to do until you make the changes permanent?”

“Take a break. Chill out. Don’t worry about anything. We do value your input concerning the changes we’re making, so feel free to comment. But meanwhile, just take it easy for a couple days (weeks, months, years…). We’ll be sure to keep you updated.”

“Can I keep the plant?”

“Sure, take the plant. Shit, take my stapler. It’s yours.”

“Can I come by to say hi once in a while?”

“Of course! Tell you what, I’ll even treat you to anything you want from the vending machine. How ‘bout that?”

“Alright. I like Sour Patch Kids. ‘Cuz they’re sour, then they’re sweet.”

“Whatever you want, Jarrett.”

DUMB

Me having a blog must be the worst idea in the world. I’m polluting the Internet. Haha, I’m like Rick James walking in Charlie and fuck I totally forgot his brother’s name Murphy’s house and draggin’ in dirt and shit and stompin’ on they couch.

“They neva should’ve gave you niggas money!”

HAHAH, jeez I’m an idiot.

Please refer to chart 3.1

I now work at the Tolman Education/Psychology library in Berkeley, so when I'm shelving, I get an idea of what books the faculty in psychology like to borrow. There's one book, it's kept behind the circulation desk, called the DSM and apparently it's the book of standards for psychologists. It outlines what they have agreed upon in various topics in psychology.

DSM-III diagnostic criteria for schizotypal personality disorder

At least four of the following:

1. Magical thinking, e.g. superstitiousness, clairvoyance, telepathy, 'sixth sense', 'others can feel my feelings' (in children and adolescents, bizzare fantasies or preoccupations);
2. Ideas of reference;
3. Social isolation, e.g. no close friends or confidants, social contacts limited to essential everyday tasks;
4. Recurrent illusions, sensing the presence of a force or person not actually present (e.g. 'I felt as if my dead mother were in the room with me'), depersonaization or derealization not associated with panic attacks;
5. Odd speech (without loosening of associations or incoherence), e.g. speech that is digressive, vague, over-elaborate, circumstantial, metaphorical;
6. Inadequate rapport in face-to-face interaction due to constricted or inappropriate affect, e.g. aloof, cold;
7. Suspiciousness or paranoid ideation;
8. Undue social anxiety or hypersensitivity ro real or imagined criticism.

Word? I have like 3 of thems. What does that make me? I always do things half-assed.